Samstag, 25. Juni 2011

"The new ladette or: Call my bluff?"

More and more women get agressive, behave in a boisterously laddish way like rude remarks or incongruous behaviour in puplic. They drink (what actually should be untypical for women) and are known as

It is a part of the feminist movement when women tried ro fight the image of the weaker sex and started behaving like stereotyped men: drinking, taking drugs, unsavory behavior ...

Also the number of drinking women and young girls increases radically. It usually ends in binge drinking and hospital, rape or even death.

Young girls drink to be more like men,
or they drink to loose their shame and get more jolly.

There are some other girls who show their feminist side by calling themselves baby or chick. They wear sexy clothes, usually short and show lot of skin. It is to show the men, "Hey Mister, see how good looking I am? I am willing to have sex with you!!" basicliy that is the message of these girls. They accepted the weaker sex as being a woman but you can play with that my wearing this kind of clothes and behaving obscene.

Fact is that women shouldn't change themselves just to be liked by men. They should behave like they would always do and then they find the right guy.

Freitag, 24. Juni 2011

Love - Do you belive at love at the first sight?

Love - what is that? It is a feeling you can't describe. It is felt different by everyone. It can be the love to a hobby like music or painting. It can be love to a child or a familymember. Love to a friend or love to a person.
This person makes you happy, makes you laugh and impartial. You feel free and good when you are with this person. All the worries are blown away because you are happy and you feel this special feeling. It starts when you feel the body or this person. When the hand touches you. It is not sexual ment. It is just that you feel all the love flows in you. It's getting warm inside and you know it's love. You feel pins and needles in your stomach and a feeling of happyness and freedom, luck, joy and absence of gravety floods your whole body. That is what loves feels like.

My opinion is that the the basic of love is first of all trust. You have to trust each other unconditionally. Without trust a good relationship cannot work.
Of course jealousey is important, but in a healthy way.

Integrity and respect also plays a nother very important role in a good relationship.
Both partners are equal and should treat each other the way they want to be treaten.

Love is an amazing feeling. It is so hard to describe it but so easy to feel.
Love is when you think you know this person for you whole life.
Love is when you can laugh together.
Love is when you feel comfortable and safe.
Love is a wunderful feeling.
Love is when you feel like the happiest person ever.
Love is important for life.

Do you belive at love at the first sight?

Yes, I do. I think when you meet a person for the first time you feel straight away if he or she is THE ONE. Even if you met thousands of people before when you meet THE ONE you will feel it. It will be a completely different kind of love.

It will be the love what lasts for ever. and ever.

Donnerstag, 23. Juni 2011

"A gender for change"

It was a hard and longlasting time for women until they got what they wanted:
Same rights, equal pay, same opportunities and chances.

Even these days some women still have to fight for their rights and to be treated the same way as men are.
Still some men do not see women equal to them. Their attidues change quiet slow and that is probably because of the never ending hollywood movies where women are still seen as housewives who cook, clean and educate the children.

But the majority of men got also changed by feminist movement.
They accept women in the government, at their working place and also most important they see women as a equal partner in relationship.
Women used to say at home and the men went to work brought home the money and regulated the income by paying for everything. It seemed like women were just dominated by men. It is for sure still like that, but feminism changed it!
Now also women go working and some men stay at home, looking after the children.
Women are allowed to vote since 1919(Germany) and even our chancellor is a woman.
I alos think more and more women start dominating the men. In relationships for example. There are heaps of women who tell their partner what to do and who are the "leader" of the relationship.

That might also come up because of the feminism. The women took that what the men wanted: Power.
At least I think it is for shure important for us women that we got the same righs, opportunities and are treated equal, but still women usually need a stronh shoulder for protection and who can do it better than a men who loves them:)

Dienstag, 21. Juni 2011

"A bad Victory for Women"

I would like to tell you about a story I read: It was about a women who got £15.6m because she had been sexually discriminated by her colleagues and her boss.Sounds fair and pretty good. But now I will tell you why she bewailed:

Her boss had said about her that she's too old and ugly and can't do the job. That is pretty rough tough! That is actually no sexual discrimination!
The nother poit of getting this huge amount of money was because her male colleagues did NOT invite her to come with them to a strip club!!Huuuuuh???

I would say it is sexual discrimination if my colegues would invite me to the strip club!! To watch them looking at almost naked girls full with silicone and dancing infront of them, while my colleagues start getting horney and the next day I have to work with them again?? What is actually more disgusting?

Well, anyway this women said she was regulary treated snotty infront of her colleagues denied lucrative accounts and discriminated by not being invited to a basketball game or the golf game or to a visit to a strip club. Also she bewailed the position of her desk, which was placed among a lower PA's.
I think this women should rather see a doctor with this money. Of course she might be offended of not being invited to a basketball game or for going playing golf, but it is ballsy to claim for such a huge amount of money for that.

Her boss might also be a bad guy but in the story it said he was treating everyone badly not just her.

Anyway..I have a nother concern:
sexual harassment: Usually women are affected by it. Let it be at the working place where the boss makes her do things (sexual things) for giving her more money or not loosing the job. Sometimes teachers do sexual harassment and the students get better marks or do not have to pepeat class.

Also men who rape girls or women usually start with sexual harassment. They make them do sexual thing without the womens' or girls' will.

But still there are for shure some men who are victims of sexuall harassment, don't forgett that.

The best thing is to talk to someone about it. Even if the person who molests you is threaten you!
The best solution is to tell someone you can trust!

Montag, 20. Juni 2011

Prattle of the Sexes - Do Men and Women speak the same language???

Men never listen and women never get the point. That is the well-known cliché about men and women. When you go in a café and watch men and women having conversations, when you go to school and watch how boys and girls are talking can you actually make a differnece???

The difference is not ment to be in grammar or language, it is the way men and women express themselves. Fact is that women like to gossip. But men also like doing that. We usually say men avoid talking about feelings instead of women who LOVE sharing problems with others. But why is that?? think showing emotions or talkin about feelings could show how vulnerable they actually are. They are humans just as women are so they all have feelings. But men have the fear by showing them or talking about them others (especially other men) would think they're softies and pussies. Men need time to open themselves to others.
Wome in this case are more uncomlicated. They talk about their problems to everyone.
Because of the fact that most of the men avoid conversations about feelings and women find it hard to express themselves and being understood, communication problems come up.
An example is the meta-message:

Imagine a husband and his wife sitting on the couch and watching TV. Suddenly the woman asks her husband: "Why didn't you ask me how my day was?" and the man answers: "Ive something would have happened you would have told me!"
To explain the situation:
The woman is fed up because the man didn't ask her about her day, it is the thing that he did not talk to her, not the meaning of how her day was.
The men doesn't understand and is confused, he would have talked to her when she wanted to, but she didn't tell him. So he just understood the meta-message in a different way. That is the main problem of communication problems.

To avoid these the women should just talk. They should talk to their husbands and not expecting them to start a conversation all the time.

Also it is proofed, that women and men differ in having conversations. The women usually sit close together and are really into each other. They have lot of eye contact and talk about problems and emotions. They agree a lot with the other person to bond the relationship and to get to know each other better and to show the other one that they can trust each other.

Men instead sit comfortable, lean back and rather talk about information than listen and giving advices to solute problems.
That explains why most of the men prefer informative and structured talking and thinking and women like emotional based and more complicated talking.

Even if there are some differences in how men and women talk I think it is not a problem of gender, it is the matter of what kind of persons are talking to each other.
There are men who can talk with women for hours and talk about problems and feelings while there are women how prefer having conversations with men because they understand them.
Fact is that the way we express or we have conversations might differ but I think it depends on the person you are talking to, this person has to understand you and hast to speak the same language as you do - not matter male or female!

Sonntag, 19. Juni 2011

"The Myth of the Super Dad"

First of all we should try to define what a superdad actually is: Is it a man who takes care about his children all the time, who does everything for them, who loves them and cares about them as much as a loving mum? Society thinks that is how a superdad should be! While pregnancy he sould already start talking to the baby, the superdad is suposed to stay at home and take care about his pregnant wife, because of the baby. After birth he is there for the child twentie-for seven. He is going for a walk with the baby and playing with it and feeding it, changing napies and bringing it to bed. In the night HE is getting up and waiting and singing till the baby is back to sleep. wish!!!

There are some men who pretent doing that: These are called Smug Dads. They go for a walk with the baby and feed it infront of other dads and mums and play with it and talk and report about who bussy the night was after getting up 4 times and bringing the baby back to sleep. But actually they're just showing off. They never do anythink like that at home. At night they rather go out with their mates and drink instead of looking for the baby or at least help the mum to bade it and feed it. Of course you sould be happy and proud of being a dad but don't just show off and pretending being a dad, BE A REAL DAD!! Help the mum of your child not just when other people are around.

There is also a nother man called 'the new man'. He always looks fabulous and also gets up in the middle of the night and looks after the crying baby. Actually this man is perfect. He looks amazing by wearing stuff from Armani, Calvin Kleind or Gucci. He talks about his feelings with his girlfriend and loves to spend time with the kids. But also this man (and we all know that) doesn't exist. It is just a illusion.

So we still didn't clarify the question about what a real superdad is.
Actually superdads just love their children unconditionally. They love them when they come home with good marks, with bad marks. When they finish school with an excellent certification and when they are drunk and the police had to bring them home, the superdad still loves his children. I think superdads should give their children freedom. Of course parents want to take care about them, they want to protect them and sometimes they have to be stric and forbidd them things but is this really necessary? I think children should learn by doing things, trying out new stuff, make own experiences. So the superdad is giving the children love and freedom. These two things are part of the secret of how to be a super dad.

This might also be the solution for dads who have to work so much and never actually have time for their children. When they have to work 60h or 48h a week the usually need firstly time for themselves. They are stressed and annoyed by the children. That is the worst thing you can ever do. Shure when the kids are younger the wanna spend time with their dads. And when the dads work a lot and get stressed

it is going to get a disturbed relationship between dad and child. To avoid that more and more dads get off work and take paided holidays. The can spend time with their children while they are young and they can support the mum. There are also some of this organizations which support dads of retarded kids to spend more time with them.

Donnerstag, 16. Juni 2011

Trip to the St. Dominikus Gymnasium in Karlsruhe - "hey, only girls here!"

It is the 19. april, 9am. Our Seminarkurs enters the catholic St. Dominikus Gymnasium in Karlsruhe. It is a nice building. Inside there are some artworks of students. Busy students are running around because the next lesson is just going to start. A normal school just like any other school without the thing that only girls come here.

About 720 girls are visiting this school compared to the Albertus-Magnus Gymnasium where 429 girls out of 921 students come every day.
My concern was to find out, why this girls chose a only-girls school and where they see the advantages instead of visiting a school for both sexes.
We started the mission in the principal´s room (of course she was a women;) ) and she told us something about her school. compared to our school the girls are really advanced. First of all in science because it is well-known that boys usually dominate in science.
After a little talk with the headmaster we were allocated into differnet classes.
My friend Janine and I were visitors in a 5th grade. After we introduced ourselves we took a seat in the back row and followed the lesson. The girls were quiet and listened to the teacher. The topic of the lesson was "poems". The girls started a groupwork
and had to find out (buy talking with each other and using a encyclopedia) what kind of job the author of the several poems could also have.
While the girls were talking in groups they were listening and really into each others suggestions. The whole groupworking was quiet and the girls were all working. While presenting their work the others were listening and if someone had a question they just put up their hands without screaming.

After the lesson was finished we interviewed the girls and asked them why they chose a school just for girls:
-"I already had some fiends here"
-"I don't like boys, they amuse me."
-"In primary school I usually was too shy to talk in class because I was afraid of talking infront of boys"

All in all we noticed that the girls prefered a school without boys because they were afraid talking infront of them or because they were amusing them.

We also asked the girls if the have more male or more female friends and all of them answered they have more female friends, because they go to a school just for girls but they also have male friends.

The break did already start and Janine and Me were watching the girls. They were sitting all around us and wanted to talk. They were interested in us and were really pleased to answer our questions.
None of them were running around and screaming like we are used to in our school.

Then we followed them to their next lesson: Sports.

The girls changed their stuff quiet quickly (probably too much talking in the changing rooms) and then they met in the sports hall.

Then all of them met with the teacher in the middle of the hall..EVERYONE was quiet, no talking, no wispering...nothing!!

They had to do some exercises with a rope and they all gave the best they could.

Later on we had the chance to interview some teachers. We asked them why they chose an only-girls school. Most of them said it is much easier to teach here. The girls are more quiet, they listen and they are pleased to learn something.

Still some of the teacher mentioned that they miss the boys in class. It is fact that different sexes express different, have other ideas and think in a different way.
All the teachers agreed and said it is proofed that the girls learn more and better without the boys, because they're not amused and they can show what they know without hesitating. Also special teaching methods can be used for the girls.

But now: the crucial question: Does it make sense to visit a school just for girls?
Well it is obviously proofed that girls learn better whithout boys because they can also dominate in sciense. Also special learning methods can be applied for the girls and so a selective learning is promoted.
But on the other side we all know that there is no wolrd without boys. The girls are going to have work with them and to cooperate with them, too.
At least it is to say that there are clever girls who go to a school just for girls and there are clever ones who visit a normal school for both sexes.